A Song and a Post...Not a Happy One Though.
For all I've been blessed with in my life
There was an emptiness in me
I was imprisoned by the power of gold
With one kind touch you've set me free
Chorus:
Let the world stop turning
Let the sun stop burning
Let them tell me love's not worth going through
If it all falls apart, I will know deep in my heart
The only dream that mattered had come true.
In this life, I was loved by you.
For every mountain I have climbed
Every raging river crossed
You were the treasure that I longed to find
Without your love I would be lost.
(Repeat chorus)
I know that I won't live forever
But forever I'll be loving you.
(Repeat chorus)
~End~
Well, that was the song...here is the post...viewer discretion is advised.
WARNING:
Reading the following endangers you.
If you read the following, you may be eaten by ducks...slowly
You may anger Brad....will you risk it?
You may totally destroy the friendship you had with Brad....if you had one...
What are you willing to put on the line...
Pretty much, The search for a Job is horrible, as always. People continue to get angry at me...as always. I continue to mess up...as always. What's new? What's new is this. Questions...
There are too many questions floating around in my mind...and the Answers I can't get myself. This is frustrating. These questions are very relevant with the near future. I have found out, that I hate the future. The future is dim, and clouded. I don't want the future to become the present. Why do I doubt things that are so apparent?
Many things are changing...not many for the better...Old friends are drifting farther apart...tension is created. New friendships are hard to come by...since after all, I am a loner....no one likes them. they are too secretive. And NO one likes a secretive person. Id there was ONE person who actually showed some interest...the burden would be lifted. But for now, I am weighed with the burden a former life, a life that wants to set free.
I wish people could tell me their problems...that way, I wouldn't have to look at my own. I would be able to help someone in need. That is something I am good at...
That is all for now.
posted by Aielunknown at 4:34 PM
2 Comments:
...
Well, I'll be honest and say that I don't have much to say except that I am trying to be a good friend, only I fail a lot. And it's my fault, I'm too sarcastic.
Psalm 29:11 says...
"The LORD will give strength unto his people; the LORD will bless his people with peace."
There is nothing wrong with loners. Now, I don't find you to be one, by the way, but if there were no loners, who would we have to become friends with? It would be boring if everyone was already friends with everyone else.
I hope I don't sound as if I'm some perfect person who goes and befriends everyone, I'm not..
But...you say that you hate the future. hating the future is like hating your whole life, because every second that passes is the future. The future comes and goes like -that- *snaps fingers*
You shouldn't worry yourself with questions. Life is too full of them. If you worry about them too much, you'll either end up going to heaven earlier than intended, or you'll become an insomniac. Both of which are not things to consider.
I think you know well enough that there is freedom through Christ. Taking away former lives and bringing forth new ones are something He does best. Worry and doubt aren't something He would want you to bear on your own. He doesn't want you to bear them at all!
It doesn't SOUND like you've given these things you think about over to Jesus. Maybe you think you have, but if you did...Don't you think you'd be feeling different? Don't you think that this feeling of downheartedness would pass?
I pray it does. See you Thursday. Sorry that this ended up kind of long, and kind of scattered in different directions, by the way.
=)
*H*
Gah, H. beat me to posting, since Blogger was being a Booger. (just a couple letters off.)
I'm pretty sure I talked to you about some of this last night, so I'm not going to repeat myself, I'll just say I agree with H. and that it really will change and that we try to be here for you... :(
If we're not doing our job right, let us know, shake us till we make sense, please!
And again, you're not really a loner. Yeesh. You're not! You wish to be alone sometimes, fair enough. You're introverted, Okay. But not a loner. Really. Loner's don't have friends. And you have some. (At least I would hope you consider us friends... I'd be kinda sad if you didn't. [not kinda sad, very very very sad actually. I've lost enough friends in the past month... don't want to loose you too.])
Anyway... I dunno. I probably should just IM you, or give you a hug tomorrow or something. I think you need one. But please, correct me if I'm wrong. I'm just Kiaya remember. I'm a little on the crazy side of things and don't think to clearly through the fog.
Chin up Brad. :)
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